By definition, domestic violence cases are high conflict. Nonetheless, let’s talk about getting through it, even if your case does not involve domestic violence.
Over the years, we’ve worked with hundreds of litigants. Most of our work involves cases where Judicial Misconduct and/or the abuse of Judicial Discretion is at the root of the problem. Family Law is an incredibly subjective area of the law and Judges often rule heavily influenced by their own biases, culture, religious beliefs, upbringing and yes, even axes of discrimination.
We will soon cover the rulings of a Judge who seems to have a clear bias in cases involving alleged and/or diagnosed mental illness. Retired Solano County Judge Cynda Unger-Riggins famously refused to recuse herself from cases where her late husband represented one of the litigants, many times, citing that she didn’t believe there was a conflict of interest. Did the Presiding Judge take action? No. Did the Commission on Judicial Performance take action? Absolutely not.
So what do you do when you are not only dealing with the stress of high conflict litigation, but you believe you have a problem with the judge?
You band together.
If there is one truth that we have witnessed, consistently, if a Judge does it, they’ve done it before. Some have gotten away with misconduct for so long, they are brazen with it. They know that checks and balances are nearly non-existent in Family Court.
Find other litigants in the same position you are. There is strength in numbers. There is value in being able to compare experiences to uncover patterns. If each person experiencing misconduct stays in a silo, they believe they are having an isolated experience. If four litigants compare experiences, they begin to notice a pattern.
Sometimes your family cannot help. Many litigants come from under-resourced communities with families that steer clear of the judicial system in any way possible. Many litigants are embarrassed to share the reality of the experience they are enduring. Many litigants have people they “thought” were their friends turn on them, as though their bad fortune is a contagious virus they’re trying not to catch.
High conflict litigation can destroy your mental and physical health. You need all the resources you can get. Sometimes those resources are other litigants that can offer a shoulder to cry on, share resources and tips, or offer reassurance when you are at your lowest, show up for you on your hearing dates just so you don’t feel so alone.
Talk about it, openly. When judges “go rogue”, you’d be surprised how many people in the legal community (attorneys, paralegals, file clerks) are well aware of their bad practices. Not just in your county, but in other counties. People talk. People who work “behind the scenes” move around.
You just didn’t know about it because complaints trickle in like sporadic raindrops on a misty day.
You need to band together to bring the storm.